“She tilted her head back…”

Hey guys,

This piece was written with a focus on natural speech. I also experimented with providing snippets of each character’s intentions and internal reactions to one another. Curious to know if you think it’s a style worth exploring some more.  I realise I haven’t done much to describe the surrounding environment, for a longer piece this would have to be addressed. 



She tilted her head back and brushed her hands through her hair, soft and smooth. Zoe loved the way it felt on first wash days. It was soothing. This was never a bad thing around Michael. It grounded her amidst adrenaline pumped feelings. She looked back up at Michael, who was sat opposite her smiling softly, and commented: “Tired?”

“Not especially, just savoring the lush feeling against my hands.”  Zoe sighed as she combed her chestnut hair to drape over one shoulder. She knew he liked that look just by the way he peered over the rim of his coffee cup, whilst sipping at his mocha. “So, what’s got you all quiet and contemplative?”

His gaze lingered on her glossy hair whilst swirling the rich mocha around his mouth, savouring both, before eventually swallowing. Zoe wondered if he took as much delight in admiring her secretly, as he did in relishing his mocha openly.

Michael stirred the beverage deliberately. “Well, it’s, a job”

“Really?”  Deception; typically Michael. “As in, you’ve got one or prepping for another interview?”

“Well both actually. I’ve somehow managed to receive an interview for almost every application I made.” Michael was still in some disbelief about his success. The last round of applications three years ago had been a blow to his ego.

“Highly sought after are we?” Zoe teased.

Michael grinned. He hadn’t ever really thought about himself in that way. But he liked that she did. “I guess so; to be honest now I’ve been offered the job I’m not sure how I feel about it.”

“How comes? Is it not the one you wanted than?” Zoe stopped playing, with her hair at least even if not with her words, and leaned in to listen closely.

“Well, it’s what I thought I wanted. It’s the one in Australia.” He glanced up to catch her expression. A momentary blank look.

“Oh right, that’s cool. What’s to think about? You wanted it, you’ve got it and there’s endless sunshine. It’s a no brainer!” Am I over compensating?

Michael kicked himself as he laughed; a predictable response from Zoe. “Yeah, very true. But it’s a bit mind-blowing really. It’s a big change. I’m not sure how everyone will take to it. Nobody really knows I even applied.”

“It’s like you always say though, if you dare to take the plunge, the view from the other side could be spectacular. Although in this case, the view from down under could be spectacular!” Giving him his own advice felt strange to Zoe.

He laughed out. “So you do listen!”

“More than you know…” Zoe looked at the time on her phone. Any distraction was a good distraction right now. 12:36pm. She’d have to leave soon. The sky looked threatening. Zoe recalled the weather update, 30% chance of rain. She tuned back into Michael:

“So I have 2 weeks to tell them if I want it or not. I think I’m meant to be further along in the migration process than I realized. They talked as though they expected me to have a visa in order.”

“You need to hurry up and decide if you really want it. Who else have you told?”

“Nobody yet. I need to tell mum and Alex of course. Not looking forward to that. They just won’t understand, especially mum.” Michael had always felt he was leaving them behind, even when he moved out to the city.

“Sounds as if you’ve already made up your mind?” She challenged him hesitatingly. Zoe realized she just didn’t want him to leave. The last 4 months of slow cooking would be rendered futile.

“To be honest, I think I have Zoe. I just need to be sure.”

Zoe looked out on to the street; the windows were just beginning to catch the first droplets. It would be a rainy day after all.

3 thoughts on ““She tilted her head back…”

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